Sunday, September 21, 2008

Suddenly Ninjas...Hundreds of Them!

The days were getting longer. Trawling through Endenrailens' 0.4 low security space had it's drawbacks. And the biggest drawback of all, seemed to be the lack of action. Maybe I was looking in the wrong places, but I needed some excitement. The last few days I had been training up skills, learning about safe spots, and getting adept with my directional scanner. I felt ready for the next step, but I was still unsure what that was.

I had been contacted by a small pirate corporation via one of my contacts through holo-poker, but I had heard about a corporation operating in High Security, who were specialists at "extracting tears" from the carebear folk. This sounded exactly like my cup of tea. The corp was called Suddenly Ninjas, and they specialised in 'Ninja' salvaging carebears precious level 4 missions. It was roughly 15 jumps away, but I waved Endenrailen goodbye, aligned my ship and didn't look back. I won't reveal my new home solar system, enemies could track this electronic database. I will simply refer to it as home.

The Suddenly Ninjas crew were a friendly bunch, a few were even new recruits like myself. My home base was a hub for carebear mission running/trading/mining. It was the perfect place to extract tears, and carry on the fight against the dull orders of greedy money mongering corporations. Before I could begin salvaging glorious wrecks right under the noses of glazy eyed carebears, I needed the skills to pinpoint their location. I needed Salvaging IV and Astrometrics IV. I trained them both up with urgency, and began scanning down mission wrecks, focusing on salvaging the "large" wrecks, as they held the best salvage!

I truly felt like a Ninja [OOC: Even though this blog is about Pirates], and I was being more then compensated in ISK returns. I settled into an easy routine; scan them down and get a mission gate location to bookmark. Warp in with my Incursus loaded with Salvaging gear. Salvage! Extract tears. Repeat.

Max Marvel gets the credit for stripping me of my Tears Extraction Virginity. Go Max!

[ 2008.09.13 16:09:40 ] Max Marvel > tom you fing suck
[ 2008.09.13 16:09:52 ] Max Marvel > go learn how to run your own l4 mish's
[ 2008.09.13 16:10:00 ] Max Marvel > stop stealing salv
[ 2008.09.13 16:10:20 ] Evee Lovemuffin > steal their loot too
[ 2008.09.13 16:11:22 ] Tom Jackrabbit > Suddenly....Ninjas!
[ 2008.09.13 16:11:42 ] Bluestone > Hundreds of them?
[ 2008.09.13 16:12:04 ] Ti'anna > I could ram him with my shuttle
[ 2008.09.13 16:13:57 ] Ti'anna > yeeha. free velator! lol
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:07 ] Bluestone > :o
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:08 ] Max Marvel > ti'anna
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:15 ] Max Marvel > come kill this loser tom in your velator
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:20 ] Max Marvel > ill send you 1mil isk
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:42 ] Vid Eeomeet > cough cough (bottom feeder) cough cough
[ 2008.09.13 16:14:48 ] Max Marvel > hate people who wreck steal
[ 2008.09.13 16:15:08 ] Max Marvel > seriously... theres alot more profitable things to do with your time
[ 2008.09.13 16:15:12 ] Bluestone > /emote gets some popcorn
[ 2008.09.13 16:15:20 ] Vid Eeomeet > hahaha
[ 2008.09.13 16:15:28 ] Ti'anna > yeah. im just having fun. back to 0.0 for me
[ 2008.09.13 16:16:17 ] Bluestone > Need more drama, I've only just started me popcorn :(
[ 2008.09.13 16:17:28 ] Tom Jackrabbit > Hundreds of them! Ninjas! Suddenly...
[ 2008.09.13 16:17:46 ] Evee Lovemuffin > lol
[ 2008.09.13 16:17:47 ] Bluestone > ...someone crys about losing a wreck
[ 2008.09.13 16:17:50 ] Max Marvel > hope your corp doesnt mind you stealing liek this
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:09 ] phree4u > taking salvage isnt stealing momo
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:26 ] Evee Lovemuffin > it is, it's just not against the rules
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:32 ] Max Marvel > dont be stupid with the technicalities
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:36 ] Tom Jackrabbit > I would imagine that they don't mind. You should send a mail and ask though...cos I'm not sure :-/
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:45 ] Tom Jackrabbit > my ceo would prolly be real unhappy...so please dont actually
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:52 ] Bluestone > :o
[ 2008.09.13 16:18:54 ] Tom Jackrabbit > ill give you back the loot if your promise not to right to him?
[ 2008.09.13 16:19:11 ] Jons Squire > is Tom being bad again??!??!
[ 2008.09.13 16:19:21 ] Jons Squire > What did we tell you last time Tom??
[ 2008.09.13 16:19:29 ] Evee Lovemuffin > get your stuff back then write
[ 2008.09.13 16:19:58 ] Tom Jackrabbit > You told me to stop wreck stealing Jon :( im sorry. i know its against the corp rules.
[ 2008.09.13 16:20:13 ] Jons Squire > bad bad bad rabbit
[ 2008.09.13 16:20:33 ] Tom Jackrabbit > just dont tell tchell...
[ 2008.09.13 16:20:33 ] Bluestone > /emote offers popcorn around to various people
[ 2008.09.13 16:20:41 ] Tom Jackrabbit > i sure hope max marvelous isnt writing to him now
[ 2008.09.13 16:20:50 ] Zero Fate > tchell loves my epeen
[ 2008.09.13 16:21:10 ] Jons Squire > give me half the loot and i won't tell
[ 2008.09.13 16:21:18 ] rdnmj > /emote takes some popcorn seeing these alts talking to themselfs
[ 2008.09.13 16:23:10 ] Tom Jackrabbit > i dont have alts :D
[ 2008.09.13 16:23:16 ] rdnmj > beside i dont think your CEO cares if you ninja salvage other peoples missions sins his bio is a bit obvius
[ 2008.09.13 16:23:43 ] rdnmj > Tchell dahhn
[ 2008.09.13 16:23:53 ] Tom Jackrabbit > rdnmj wins a prize!
[ 2008.09.13 16:24:10 ] Bluestone > You spoiled it :(
[ 2008.09.13 16:25:51 ] Max Marvel > your a moron rom
[ 2008.09.13 16:25:52 ] Max Marvel > tom
[ 2008.09.13 16:25:57 ] Max Marvel > so is your whole corp
[ 2008.09.13 16:27:06 ] Tom Jackrabbit > I'm so offended I don't know how to respond :(
[ 2008.09.13 16:27:18 ] Zero Fate > masturbate?
[ 2008.09.13 16:27:44 ] rdnmj > well he got nothing betwen his legs so bit hard
[ 2008.09.13 16:27:54 ] Max Marvel > dont please... the sight of your name in my chat box is embarrasing
[ 2008.09.13 16:28:49 ] Max Marvel > nothing better to do with your life then to sit around looking for player missions to steal a pitful pile of salvage junk from
[ 2008.09.13 16:29:18 ] Bluestone > Salvage as you go, or QQ more :)
[ 2008.09.13 16:29:22 ] Tom Jackrabbit > Oh, Mr Marvelous....if it's so pitiful why are we still talking about it?
[ 2008.09.13 16:30:25 ] rdnmj > /emote runs past Bluestone´s ship and takes some more popcorn
[ 2008.09.13 16:30:25 ] Max Marvel > cause its dumb to even do it... i dont care about the salvage.. its annoying having little pips like you fly around all the missions thinking this is a good way to spend your time
[ 2008.09.13 16:30:36 ] Androz Chen > penis
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:07 ] Tom Jackrabbit > It's not so much the looting as the carebear tears that make it worth it :->
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:10 ] Bluestone > /emote runs to the microwave to stick some more popcorn in
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:15 ] Max Marvel > anyways im done... just wanted to let you know your corps not funny and its dumb to think your actually spending your time wisely doing that
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:23 ] Max Marvel > yeah so i read in your ceo bio
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:26 ] Max Marvel > morons
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:41 ] Max Marvel > anyways have fun continuing to waste your life
[ 2008.09.13 16:31:52 ] Tom Jackrabbit > Will do! Lovely chatting to you Mr Marvelous.


[OOC: As you can see, Mr Marvelous brings up the topic of "wasting ones' life", I find it amusing that carebears often see Ninja Salvaging as "wasting your life". Let's disregard the fact that we are all playing a video-game for a moment, and consider the key differences between alternative career paths like Ninja Salvaging, and Mission Runners. The prize of all Ninja Salvagers is not simply good loot, but Carebear Tears! We rely on social interaction to fuel our enjoyment of the game, just as an MMO should be. Carebear Mission Runners rely on computer generated responses of NPC's to get their 'enjoyment' out of the game. It's ironic really, because essentially they are playing Eve Offline. And on top of that, the only social interactions they do seem to have appear to be negative and include tears, and involve people from fun Corps that pirate/salvage/ransom.]


The ISK and tears were rolling in. I was happy.

Long live the Rabbit!

4 comments:

Gregg said...

LOL Tom Jackrabbit - I love your style. Totally agree I hate people playing a "massively multiplayer Online Single player Game" and completely back what your corp stands for! keep up the good work, and I hope to see you round the traps... Hell I hope we get to spill a few carebears tears along side you sometime - LONG LIVE THE JACKRABBIT

Mynxee said...

Another vote for the Ninjas! Enjoyed this write-up, too.

Tom Jackrabbit said...

Thanks for your comments guys! It's nice to know someone is actually reading these posts, and my blog just isn't lost somewhere in the blogosphere. I heard that there is more blogs then people in the world O.o Not sure how true that is though!

Keystone said...

Haha! This is too funny! I might have to join you guys- sounds like a riot!